Episode 34 - Our Holidays Approach

In this cozy (and slightly chaotic) holiday episode of Unfiltered Us, we break down how we approach the holidays as a couple — from traditions we love, routines we’ve created, how we split time with family, and the things we don’t always agree on. 🎄🎁

We talk about holiday stress, gift-giving styles, cultural traditions, boundaries, food, celebrations, and how we keep our relationship strong when the season gets hectic. Whether you’re team “decorate early” or “wait until December,” you’ll relate to at least one of us!

Expect laughs, real talk, and a few holiday confessions as we share what works for us, what doesn’t, and how we’re building our own festive traditions as a couple.

🎧 Listen now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you listen to podcasts!

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Transcript

You're listening to unfiltered us, where we keep it real and unscripted. I'm your host, Suzy, along with my husband, Miguel. Ready to dive in? Let's get started. All right. Welcome, everybody. Welcome. Welcome, my love. How are you today? Great. How are you? Doing amazing. Thank you. You look beautiful, as always. Thank you so much. And you look so handsome. Like always. So sexy. So anyways. All right, we got a interesting topic today as we approach the holidays. Yes, we're gonna be talking about holidays. We'll talk about the holidays. You know, I figure as we as we move forward with our podcast, um, I guess this is a good topic for people to know not only our story, but how we approach holidays and what we've been able to do for the holidays over the past few years. And, uh, you know how we do what we do for the holidays. I guess you can say. Yeah. Traditions. Yeah. Traditions start. You want to start right now with, like, maybe Thanksgiving? Yeah. Since that's the first one coming up. That's this week. That's tomorrow. Tomorrow we'll have Thanksgiving. It's the day you guys are hearing this. Happy Thanksgiving to you. Thank you again for. We're definitely grateful for you guys. Yes. Definitely grateful for every person that supports our podcast. And every person that listens to our podcast, shares our podcast and also gives us feedback about. I love feedback so much. Yeah, I do too. It's funny because we had gone we, I forget a few weeks ago that we had gone to California and we went to one of your cousin's parties, and, um, there was a lady there that listens to our podcast. She's a friend of the family, actually, a family member of your cousin, right? Yes. And then we're we're in line with another lady, and she introduced me to the other lady, and she goes, you know what? Him and his wife, they have a podcast. You should listen to it. It's great. And so I'm like, hey, you know, that's pretty awesome. So much. I love that people are hearing about that. So but we we do appreciate we do thank you. And we hope that we keep bringing value as we end the year and as we start a new year in 2026. Yes. I'm excited for what that's gonna bring. Right. So let's talk about Thanksgiving, okay. And I know that we talked, uh, a little bit about this, uh, earlier today, but Thanksgiving to me, honestly, it's it's it's a new holiday. I not new, right. Because I, I live more of my life. Yes. Here in the US than I did back home. Right. But it, um, still nonetheless is something that it was new to me. Yes. Because you didn't grow up with Thanksgiving? No. There was no such a thing as Thanksgiving dinner. You know, I think we gave thanks to our dinner every day, like everyone should. Yes. Very, uh, United States holiday. Yeah, yeah. And and, um, I don't eat turkey. I never ate turkey in my life. And so when I move here, I have eaten turkey, but it's not my favorite. I mean, it's not the greatest thing ever invented, for sure. Yeah. I feel like a lot of people are even straying away from even making it anymore. I know, I think this is the first year that our family is not making it, that you know, of. We'll see tomorrow. I know we'll see tomorrow. Somebody shows up with some church, somebody shows up with some dried turkey. But yeah. Um, no, you know what? The thing is, I, I remember, you know, once I moved to the United States and I remember thinking, okay, Thanksgiving, everybody gets together. And then after after, you know, of course, I met you. And, uh, we were, you know, going through Thanksgiving dinners and everybody made, like, the turkey and. Yeah, the stuffing, which I find disgusting and somebody is going to stuffing is disgusting. I don't I don't like it, but anything but it could be the way my mom makes it. But the thing about it is, is that, you know, the only thing I really like about and, and this is what ended up happening when I would go to your Thanksgiving dinner with your family. Uh, I just ate, like, ham and mashed potatoes, that's all. Because it was, like, the most. You know, food that I can relate to. I guess that they, they had, you know. Well, our turkey is also very traditional. We don't keep the whole turkey whole. My parents cut it up right. And then they use like some marinades and stuff like that. They don't really bake it. I mean, they put it in the oven to like, find a kind of finish cooking it, but it gets cooked on the stovetop. And so it's like a slow. Yeah. It's slow. Yes. It's like a bio bubble. Exactly. It's not a it's not a very traditional turkey. So I've never really had. I mean I know you tried a couple times to do like a deep fried turkey. Oh I did, I used to, I never ate it, but I used to make it all the time and and it actually came out good. That's the only time I really ever had a turkey whole like that. That where we would have to carve it and stuff. But. Bless you. Excuse me. Um, yeah. No, I, I think I remember when I bought a deep fryer and I would make it, I think I would make, like 2 or 3 turkeys at a time. And I remember one time I made two turkeys for a Thanksgiving dinner, and your mom had made her turkey. And at the end of the night, um, both my turkeys were gone and her turkey kind of stayed there. And I remember she wasn't happy about that. But, you know, going back to Thanksgiving, I remember when I. And I'm sure you remember this like my sister, by the way, for all the holidays. My sister, I think, was the smartest when it came down to, um, setting up the times, right. For dinner because you figured, yes, I was always so grateful. Right, right. That was amazing. Because her her thinking was, you know, here comes the holidays. I got kids, I know they got families. I know they're gonna want to go with their families. The other side of the family, the other side of the family. So every whether it's Thanksgiving, whether it's Christmas, whether it's anything. She always made a breakfast or lunch. Yes. And it allowed us to be able to spend time with my side of the family early during the day. Yes. Or their breakfast or lunch or brunch. Right. Because it was kind of like a brunch. Right. And then, um, be there until like mid-afternoon. And then after that, go to dinner with your parents, right. Or your side of the family. So I think my sister is genius. And it was always great because she would never make turkey I that's exactly the point that I was getting to, because imagine eating turkey twice. Uh, that's exactly the point that I was gonna get to. If you remember, we never ate turkey for Thanksgiving. We like, uh. a leech on everything. She made every. Yeah, it was delicious. It was like, not a traditional. No, per se, you know, it was just a feast. But it was always so good. Yeah, it was just a feast of different food. But it was never turkey. She never cooked turkey. She never cooked her. Yeah. No. And so it was, it was perfect because we would go there and have, uh, a good brunch. Right. Yeah. A very traditional Latin. Latin every sometimes she even barbecued. Sometimes even barbecued. It was delicious. And and they could still taste it. Yeah, I know, I you know, I miss those days, man, I do, I really do too, when everybody. Yeah, I really do. And then a lot of people would show up. Right. Because, um, my nephews and their kids and you know. Oh yeah, it was great. And our kids and my mom, when she was alive. Right. It was I really missed that. Yeah. The getting together early, you know, for like, tomorrow would be, would be, uh, tomorrow's Thursday. Yeah. Today or today or people that are listening. We'll be doing that. Yeah. Tomorrow morning we would be getting ready on Thanksgiving Day early in the morning. We'll be there, you know. And then so by the time we got to your parents house, um. Yeah, I never really. It to me, like I said, it's even though I've been here more of my life than I have back home, it's still a, it's still a, um, a holiday that I doesn't make sense to you. It doesn't make sense. You didn't have, like, an accident or like, anything like that. I don't mix in Mexico. I want to say we do. It's not. I don't want to say it's a Thanksgiving. I don't know, because I know we as far as, like, my ideas would be like, oh, Felicia Gracia. Um, but I don't know. I don't think I've never been in Mexico when it's Thanksgiving, so I don't even know if they if they do a turkey or what food they serve. Or is it a traditional like dinner that they get together? I don't know, any of, you know, I think with uh, nowadays, if if we were to go back, um, they probably do now just because a lot of these Latin countries adopt so much of the American culture that like Halloween, growing up, I never knew what nobody dressed up. Nobody did Halloween. Nobody did. You know, the only time people wore like these phrases, right, like costumes, was during Carnaval. But that's Carnaval is like what? February. Right? It's like, yeah, it's during before Semana Santa. So. And that's the only time people really dressed up on a, on a costume. But like October 31st being Halloween, that never happened. Going to house to house and getting candy. That never happened. That was all new to me too. Oh, okay. Right. Yeah. We didn't have to. I know in Mexico, uh, the big deal is, uh, Dia de Los Muertos. Right? But when I'm trying to get to. Is that now that happens. Now there's such a thing as Halloween back home. Because I see sometimes they post it and I'm like, yeah. And I'm like, okay. So and they go get candy. Yes. And so and so now what I'm saying is maybe now there is a Thanksgiving Day there. You know, I'm just curious what the food is. Well, I don't know. I think it's the traditional turkey. That's what I don't know either. I don't know, I, I do remember my sister though. My oldest sister making turkey sometimes on December 24th. Oh, okay. Yeah. So sometimes like a whole turkey like. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. But I never ate it. Same thing. I never ate it. I just I just didn't care for it. I've never seen one of my family members ever make turkey like the ones that live in Mexico. She didn't make it all the time, but from time to time, they would make it. They would make they would make them Babbo. You know. So so it it it did it. Not that we don't eat turkey back home. They did. It's just it was never a Thanksgiving quote unquote holiday. And uh, the times that I have seen people made it was, um, during the December 24th, what they Christmas Eve, what they call here. Okay. You know, so but yeah. So Thanksgiving to me is. You know, it's it's even as I've been in the United States 32 years, it's still not nothing out there. I don't think for me either, even growing up here, I mean, it's great to be able to have a dinner with my family, but honestly, we do that so often anyways. I think it's such a white people thing, which is, I don't mean to sound weird, but because I feel as Americans they don't get together as often as maybe Latinos, and then it's like a big deal because. Right. You know, they don't see each other maybe every weekend like we do. You know, it's. Yeah. Um, as far as our family, we're always somebody's always that somebody's house or somebody's always eating at somebody. So we see each other constantly. To me, it's just another. Another dinner. Well, you know, there are some, you know, Hispanic families that don't get together as much as we do. And so for them, um, it might be a great thing as well, too, even though they're Hispanics or Latinos, you know, that they can come together and cook. And regardless of what they cook, that they can come together. Yeah. I think when it's somebody that doesn't get together as often, it's nice. Yeah, it's nice because then you get to get together, you guys get to talk and. Yeah, and we talk about what you're grateful for. for. But for us, it's really just another dinner. Yeah. I mean, we literally just saw each other. Everybody on Monday for my mom's birthday. Yeah. And that's the other thing about our holidays. We are drenched in birthdays. Yeah. As well, on top of the holidays. Yeah. So it's so many holidays, so many birthdays and holidays mixed from beginning with my brother's birthday, November 10th, and my mom's birthday, November 24th, then my birthday, December 11th, then my nephew's birthday, December 12th. I already lost count. I know my sister's birthday, December 22nd. My nephew's birthday, December 24th. And then when your mom was alive with December 8th. Right. So that's all between pretty much Thanksgiving and Christmas. So on top of everything else. So that's why when people ask me, oh, like the holidays, it's so beautiful. It's gonna be Christmas. Oh, I'm like, I get so stressed. I don't like this time of year actually, at all. Even though it involves my birthday. Yeah, I do not like that because of all those birthdays. Yes. I feel like it's very stressful. Like this time. This time of year is very, very stressful for me. Bye, everybody. Gift cards is the best thing you can do. It is, but it's still like, I don't know, just the. I don't know, it feels like it's still too much, even if you just get a simple gift card. It's just a lot like. Right? You have to schedule a lot of things in and it's like, yeah, it's a lot. Because on top of that, maybe sometimes there's holiday parties and this isn't it. You know, it's like so it's a it's a lot. Yeah. What about um, Christmas. Well, Christmas. I know we were discussing this earlier for me when I was little. It was December 24th. Um, but I, I feel like once we started getting older and having our own families, I mean, granted, we're grandparents. I mean, we're already three generations deep. Just us. Um, a lot of that tradition, I feel like, started to change because everybody was with their significant others on December 24th, that it ended up being us December 25th on actual Christmas. But for me, it was December 24th, waiting until midnight to be able to open a present and then waking up next morning. And yeah, opening more presents. Yeah. For me, growing up, it was the same thing. The 24th, um, the 25th was just a day. Uh, the difference between us, for us was the same thing. The 24th was the party. The 24th was, uh, you got to dress nice, right? The 24th was like, the that was that was Christmas, right? That was Christmas for us. There's no such a thing as Christmas Eve. It's just Christmas. It's the 24th. Yeah. And then I actually growing up thought Christmas was December 24th. I still think it is. Yeah. I understand when people say the 25th, I know they're like, yeah, that doesn't make sense. Yeah. This is December 24th. Yeah 100%. Yeah. So so um anyway so the, the we, we, we would go to sleep. We the difference is we didn't open gifts at midnight because at that point, you know, we still believe in Santa or whatever. Oh okay. And so we would wake up the 25th like a lot of kids do. Right. Even here and open gifts. But there was nothing going on on the 25th. It was just that's the day you saw all the kids outside playing with their toys, with their all their new toys or new bikes. Or maybe you got a new Nintendo or. Yeah, playing with that. Right. But there was no such a thing as, oh, it's Christmas, Merry Christmas. Know that that was done on the 24th. Feliz Navidad was on the 24th. Yeah. You know, and that's when everybody had their dinner, their parties and the 25th. Everybody was home chilling with their new toys and their parents or whatever. Yeah. So, um, that's the way it was. But then obviously, like you said, from obviously your parents having kids that are grown and everybody married and everybody had a kids. And my sister too, with her kids. Right? Yeah. Um, then it became to where it was, you know, but even with my sister, we would go on the 24th. Yeah, we would never went over there on the 25th ever. No, it was almost 450in because of the spouses. Like, if you like a lot of us, like my sisters, um, would go spend the time with the spouse's family, who's been celebrated because we're all married to Latinos. So it's like everybody celebrated it on the 24th. So that was our tradition, too. Right. I know that something. And so obviously we started celebrating on the 25th, but I know that's something this year you really want to bring back. You want to, um, celebrate on the 24th. Yeah. Now. Yeah. So with our family. So as far as Miguelito and Elisa, right? Yeah. Yeah, it's just gonna be you and I and our kids and their significant others and. And our grandkids. Yeah. Um, you know, and I just want to bring a dinner back on the 24th. Us get together, And I know we're doing a secret Santa between us. Yeah, so we're gonna open gifts that night, and then the 25th. It's just like what we did last year. Where the kids. I mean, obviously, Lisa is going to spend time at her house and the kids and the gifts, and then they're coming here, and then we're going to have a breakfast, and the kids are going to open gifts here. And then in the afternoon, we go to your parents house. Yeah. Um, we used to do it a little bit different where everybody used to come. Well, at first it was we would go to everybody's house when everybody's kids were little, when they were little. And since we had so many gifts, we would go to every since. We've always lived near each other. So that's the thing about me and my siblings. We I mean, we literally have the same zip code, each one of us, right? Because we live so close to our kids too. We all have the same zip code, right? We could drive to any which direction and be at someone's house in two minutes and so grow, uh, as a as our kids were growing up. When they were smaller, there were so many gifts that we would just drive. So we would start at one house. Like we would say, okay, tomorrow morning we're eating at Cindy's house and we'll open gifts there. So we would open all of Cindy's gifts that she had for everybody and we'd be like, okay, now we're going to Kim's house, and we'd go to Kim's house and open all the gifts, and then they would go, you know, like my house and my house always was the one with the breakfast, right? And so I would make breakfast for everyone. Plus we would open gifts and then we would end up at Henry's, which was last. And then my mom's would be like later in the afternoon, like maybe dinner time since we just had breakfast and we just opened all those gifts, and then my mom would be dinner and then we would open those gifts there. Right? So that's how it used to be. But now all the kids are grown up. Well, it got to a point where instead of going from house to house to house, everybody would come here. Everybody's everybody would bring the gifts here, and everybody would open gifts here at our house. But then they got. It got too much for me. It got too much where we were. We weren't even done here when we had already had to get ready to go to your mom's house, and it just got too much. It's just sometimes it's just too much, and so I, I that's why I'm like it. This makes no sense, right? I mean, you're supposed to enjoy and enjoy Christmas the 25th, and it seems more like it's just a chore and you're stressed out. And so now that's when I said, okay, look, I'm it's just in in the afternoon, late afternoon, we'll go to your parent's house, we'll have dinner. We usually do a white elephant gift exchange there. Yeah. And then, uh, which I don't know. Are they doing one this year? You know. Wait. That's right. We haven't talked about it and talk about it. So anyways, um, and then, uh, that's when I said our, our, our family just comes, you know. Yeah. On the 25th and just hangs out. I mean, it just makes more sense now we're. Yeah, we're literally grandparents now. Yeah. It makes more sense for us to have our own hours to do. It has to begin with us now. No, it has to. Do we we, you know, because that's it. This is just our family. Yeah. Not that we don't care about your siblings or anyone else, but. No, but we still see them. Yeah. Not like what I'm saying is we don't have to be there 24 or 7 with them. This is. I'd rather I want to spend time with my daughter, my son and you and my grandkids and their significant others. Yeah. You know, it's our family. So, um. Well, it's just better to start our own traditions. Yeah. You know, um, a couple of days ago, I was talking to my my cousin. He was here, and I had asked him, you know, what are you doing for the holidays? And he was like, ah, you know, the same thing. You know, we're gonna do this with my in-laws and, you know, and then this and that. And he asked me, what about you? And I said, you know, I the same thing we always do, right. Like but approaching holidays. Nowadays is just not the same as it used to be. Do you agree? It happened when your mom passed away. Probably. Yeah. To me. Ever since your mom passed away. Probably. Honestly. Because she. It was so. She passed away, right? Actually, this week would be her anniversary. Yeah, on the 29th. Yeah, it's coming up in a couple of days. Um, she passed away right before the holidays. Like right before Christmas. Well, she. I remember Thanksgiving happened, and then she. She passed away. Yeah. Um, to me, ever since your mom passed, I feel like. And I don't really care. I there was the. That year we didn't put up a tree. Zero decorations. We didn't. There was another. There was. There was another year that we didn't put up in the last. I feel like we didn't put up a tree until Alaina actually was born. Correct. Like 2020. So like three years. We did like. Yeah. Cuz I didn't care to even celebrate it like I did. Yeah. And to this point, even now, even with grandkids, I really don't even care to decorate. But if it wasn't because Saul loves Santa so much and he said he is definitely our winter baby. Like, yeah, he loves Santa. He loves anything to do with the snow. He that's our winter baby. And if it wasn't because he gets so excited for Christmas, even at his little, little age, I don't even think I would care again. Yeah, I think the the most decorations that we've done, um, since Elena was born is just the tree. Yeah, the Christmas tree. And maybe a few lights on the inside of the house, but I, I haven't, I haven't put up lights outside in a long time. Yeah. You know, and it doesn't seem like a chore too. It's like a, it is because man, it's, it's. And and now when. Now that Miguel is not here, you know, it's even more of a chore because I got to do everything myself. Um, but, um. Yeah, it maybe is that, you know. And so I told them that, and I said, man, it's just not. Obviously I didn't think at that point maybe because you know, we our mindset changed as a holidays approach. Um, you know, but it was crazy. Is that thinking about this time of the year, eight years ago, you know, I, I, I was in a hospital for 45 days. You know, my mom was in the hospital. Yeah. And so you don't have the mindset to. I don't think I even made it to your parents Thanksgiving dinner. I didn't know because I was I was you're with your mom's place, you know? Yeah. And so maybe that's what it is. It was a shift in mindset as this holidays approach that you just don't you just don't care for. It's just not the same. It isn't. And of course because of our grandkids, it's the reason why, you know, we do put up the tree. We do. I, I bought a Santa suit and I dress a Santa for them ever since she was born. You know, and so that's one thing that, you know, especially, you know, he does love that, you know. So I do it more for them. And we get into the holiday more for them. But I think if we were at this point where we would have, uh, no grandkids and I still be not decorating and not putting anything. Yeah. So we, we would do the, the exchanges on the gifts, right for the family and stuff, but I don't think I would, um. I don't think I it was just not the same. Even me saying it right now, we do it. Like I said, the only reason why we celebrated it's it's just because of our grandkids. Yeah. Because we know the joy that it brings to them. But if you if you set them aside then I don't I not that I don't care, but it's just it's not the same. It's not, it's not because I feel like sometimes people don't even appreciate what you give them. Well, there are some people that we know that that happens sometimes. You put some to such effort. Like what you give somebody. Yeah. And then they're like, you know, it's so I'm like, man, why do I care to be disappointed? Maybe that's why your family hasn't brought up the white elephant, because I don't care what they do it anymore. No, I think we're just procrastinators. Well, that is 100% true. Yeah. We are. We waited till last minute to plan everything. That's my biggest pet peeve. I mean, like, are we know when Thanksgiving is. So it's like, what do we have to put like okay, so yes I agree. But the fact that you know, that that's what you do all the time doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about it and bring it up and plan it. Your birthday is the same way. You have a birthday every year, right? You have a birthday every year. But yet people take the time to plan and do things for their birthday. Even though we know your birthday is coming, imagine it's like, oh, it's your birthday. Yeah, we just do the same thing. No. What do you want to do? What do you want to go eat, or do you want to go to trouble? Do you want to do this? You want to do that because. Holidays are blood. It doesn't matter. It's it's. I want to know if it's going to happen so I can buy my white elephant gift during Black Friday. Oh, no. So I was talking about the Thanksgiving. Oh, Thanksgiving. And we usually discuss the white elephant on things, but even Thanksgiving, even the kids have asked us, what are we doing for Thanksgiving? Well, we always do the same thing. So just because we always do the same thing doesn't mean we shouldn't bring it up and say, you know, like I asked her, I asked her, I say, hey, are you doing something with Aaron on the 24th with his family? Right. And if the answer was yes, and I'm like, okay, great, maybe at least they won't be able to make it. But the answer is no. So I told her, okay, we're going to do a dinner here that night. She goes, okay, perfect. So I asked and then I, I set it in stone and then we plant it and then we do it. Yeah, well, that's because we're starting a new tradition. This will be the second year, I think, that we're doing this, uh, kind of. Yeah, yeah. Well, because they came here on the 25th and we ended up going to your parents later. Mhm. So this would be the second year that we're doing there on the 24th of dinner. Um, no, I think this would be the first. The first, yeah the first, but the 25th. Where they come in, they open gifts. And then. Where are your parents? No, no, I'm not talking where we don't have the whole family. What I'm trying to say, they don't come here in the morning anymore. No, they have been for like three years now. You don't go to their houses either in the morning. No, no, no, we stopped that tradition. Yeah. Um, the one thing that I do want to point out, though, is that there might be somebody listening and say, man, you guys, you guys are like the Grinch. No, it's not that. Listen, if you were in it and I know this is a lot of people's favorite holidays, I love that. I love that for you. I, I really do love that for people. The people that get in the holiday and, you know, they get in the mood and they put the little yeah, you know, they wish that was me. They put the little antlers antennas in their car. You know, I don't know about all this. I love that for you. Uh, we don't judge, right? This is just our personal thing, and you might relate to us. You might like what we say and what we do and how we do things. Or you might not agree to it, which is fine, too. But, um, if you do, because there's people that do that, there's people that do love. Oh, I know a lot of people who love. And that's fine too, you know? I mean, obviously we're just this is our approach to the holidays and, Um. Everybody's different. You know, maybe with the starting new traditions, we will look at Christmas differently now. I hope so. I hope so. But cool. It's a good short topic to talk about today. Yes. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone that's listening to this. Once again, we're thankful. We appreciate you. We love you guys. And if there's anything we can do or help you with, let us know. Yes. Let us know your comments. Give us your feet like, follow and share. Oh my God. All right. My love. Sounds good. Okay. Until next week, you guys. Happy holidays. I love you, bye bye bye. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Unfiltered Us. If you enjoyed this conversation, don't forget to hit that follow button so you never miss an episode. We'd love to hear your thoughts, drop a comment, and join in the conversation. If you think someone else will enjoy today's chat, go ahead and share this episode with them. Your support means the world to us. Until next time, stay real and stay unfiltered.