Episode 32 - Do All Men Cheat?

In this raw and unfiltered episode of Unfiltered Us, we dive headfirst into one of the most controversial questions out there — “Do all men cheat?” 😬 From trust and temptation to emotional vs. physical cheating, we’re breaking down what really happens in relationships when loyalty is tested.

We share our personal thoughts, real-life experiences, and what we’ve learned about love, boundaries, and communication. This isn’t about pointing fingers — it’s about having real talk on why cheating happens, how couples can rebuild trust, and whether the phrase “once a cheater, always a cheater” is actually true.

🔥 Expect honesty, debate, laughter, and maybe even a few uncomfortable truths.

🎧 Listen now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts.

💡 Keywords (SEO):
Unfiltered Us Podcast, relationship podcast, couple podcast, do all men cheat, why men cheat, cheating in relationships, relationship advice, relationship trust issues, emotional cheating, physical cheating, relationship communication, couples discussion, love and loyalty podcast, dating and relationships, real couple conversations, honest relationship talk

📲 Follow & Engage:
Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube @UnfilteredUsPodcast for behind-the-scenes clips, hot takes, and your chance to weigh in on this week’s question!
#UnfilteredUs #RelationshipPodcast #DoAllMenCheat #CouplePodcast #LoveAndTrust #RelationshipTalk #DatingPodcast #RealConversations

Go support us by following us on socials!

Instagram: @unfiltered_us_podcast

Miguel's Instagram: @wealthy.1

Susie's Instagram: @sdguzman98

Transcript

You're listening to unfiltered us, where we keep it real and unscripted. I'm your host, Suzy, along with my husband, Miguel. Ready to dive in? Let's get started. All right. Welcome back. Welcome, everybody. Welcome, babe. You look beautiful, as always. Oh. Thank you. You're welcome. I feel like, um, we obviously missed the week, so we decided to go every other week. Yeah, well, I mean, we're still working on that and see if we get it back to once a week, but for sure, we'll do every other week for now. And, uh, go Dodgers, by the way. Yeah. What amazing. Serious man. You know, it's it was great. It was awesome. I mean, I kind of hate to say it, but I thought for sure they had, I lost it. I had no doubts the Dodgers were gonna win. I had no doubts. It was funny because I remember when the Dodgers lost game. Was it 4 or 5 and and they were going back to Toronto. And I remember you saying I don't know. They have to win both games. And I said, look, if, if, if the Blue Jays can win two games in LA, then Dodgers can win two games over there. Yeah. And sure enough they did. And amazing man. They came back from behind. I think I was watching on the TV at the gym that it was like one of the worst loss. In like History of World Series or something like that. I don't know. Any loss is a good loss, but but like the worst loss not. But you know what? Here's the thing. Like I was talking to this guy at the gym today, and I told him, I said it was such a good series right from both. It was it really was that if the Blue Jay would have won, it would have been well deserved for them. Yeah. And the Dodgers won it. Then the Dodgers deserve it. Right. And so there's there's some people that feel that the Blue Jays deserve it more than the Dodgers. But that's just not the way it goes. And they they keep score for a reason. Yes. And so back to back champs I love it. Yes okay I'm excited. So okay we got an interesting topic today. Yeah okay. Are you stressed about it. No no no I'm not I'm not I'm not stressed. It's it's um. So I was thinking about it. Right. I know you're going to talk about it, what it is, but this is purely both of ours. Um, personal opinions. Right? Correct. I mean, this isn't like, uh, for sure. for sure thing. And I don't want people coming at me. I like, oh, Miguel said this and, you know, this is my personal belief. I'm gonna say what I'm gonna say. Yeah. This is this is obviously, on the whole, the whole series of our podcast is just our pitch. It doesn't necessarily mean it's true in any way. Yeah, yeah. It's our true. It's how we view it. That's how we view it. That's how we view it. Okay. So I just don't want I want to see that disclosure up front because I know there could be men or women that could get at me, but hey, it is what it is. This is just how I feel. And, uh, people are gonna like it. And so, you know, the truth always hurts. I always say that. So if people listen to me say a few things, not just in these podcasts, but overall in life, it's because it's the truth. And sometimes some people love it and sometimes people hate it. You know, so it is what it is, but go for it. I think that's just true in general. In general. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, um, I for sure I'm known for never holding back on it. So. Okay, so today's episode is Do All Men Cheats. Are you asking me? I mean, yes, but I kind of know the answer. Yeah. I, uh, my answer is yes, I. Okay, so I was actually having this. The reason why we're talking about this. Because I actually had a discussion with this, with one of my friends, and we were discussing it, and I guess we both feel like. Yes. So all men cheat, right? But not I shouldn't say all men cheat. All men have the tendency to want to cheat. And I feel like some of them really act upon it. Yeah, and do it. And some of them. Some. Not a lot. Learn how to kind of suppress them and not do it. Does that make sense? Um, and then obviously you have the people in between who kind of do, but then they don't. So let me just rephrase this, okay? Because you said all men have the tendency and the ability. I forget what you said it to cheat. And let me just say that women do too. Okay. All women. Um. We have. Okay, so we have obviously the same. Tendency and opportunities to cheat both men and women. Okay. Hear me out. However, the man is most likely to act on it than the women. That's just the way I see it. And by nature. And what's in our DNA? We do. Okay. We do. And this is why, you know, um, there's a lot of men that do cheat. Okay. The question is why? Right. That's that's the answer that everyone's looking. Why do men always feel like they need something else other than what they have? Yeah. And when they go find it, or when they when they go look for it and they find it, then all of a sudden, let's go back to, oh, he cheated, you know. So I, uh, as far as going back to the women, I just don't feel like as women, I mean, again, I'm only speaking for myself. We feel like we're like we're okay with the one person, if that makes sense. Yeah, I, I, I think a lot, especially with my friends that I know and, you know, obviously women that I've talked to. It. We a lot of us maybe like seeing men or like the. But we don't. You don't like it? Yeah. We don't act like you don't have the urge. It's not like, oh my gosh, I need to get him in bed now. Which I kind of feel like men have that feeling when women are so much. Yeah. A small percentage of women may go that route, and it may be because there's something missing at home in their relationship. Or it may be some, uh, neglect from their husbands part of it. Right. And they're the emotional part of it. And it leads them to, uh, act that way. Plus, you gotta understand women. I agree with you. Women have that urge less than men. But then on the other side of that, you got the men that have the urge to do that. And for their. So when they when, when let's just, let's just say when 90% of the urge of men wants to do it, and only 10% of the women have that and those two combined, that's when it happens. Yeah. Does that make sense? Okay. That makes perfect. So that's that's really how it is. Okay. Now the men always have it at an all time high. Right. Because again it's it. I cannot explain it. And I have always said that even if I could, women would never understand it. And that's just the question, right? Yeah, man, can't explain it because it's wired in our DNA and women can't understand it because it's not wired in their DNA. So even I think the only time it's ever really wired or like we feel the need is, like you said earlier, it's just because something's missing at home. Yeah. And then it doesn't necessarily have to be sex that's missing. It could be like the in. I've read in a book that if women are missing an emotional connection, that's when they feel the urge to cheat. It's not when they're missing any sex or anything. It's because they're missing an emotional connection with their spouse. Right. And obviously with men, it's just different with men. Sometimes they do cheat just because they aren't getting any at home. And sometimes they just cheat because they want to feel something different. Yeah. They would just want something different. And I know we've discussed this before. It's I for men. I feel even if they're in a happy relationship and, um, they love their spouse or their partner. It's just the urge of feeling something different. Like, uh, when what I was discussing with my friend. She goes, I've talked to men who told me it's just the smell of a perfume or like a feel of a different skin, or it's just more of a sexual thing. And it's not necessarily an emotional thing, like they're gonna cheat and then like, go with the other person, right? It's just, uh, an experience they want to have with another person, but they love their spouse or their partner. Yeah. No. And that's 100% correct. You know, and and it's hard for women to understand that sometimes because the more logic you try to put behind it, you'll never understand it. It doesn't cross through your, you know, neurological system, let's just say as why men do what they do, because you're not wired that way. Men are wired that day. Right. And and and if that's. This is why you when you ask when you when men get caught cheating, right? This is why they don't have a specific answer on why they did it. They just they just did it. Right? Yeah. They just. And they're like, oh, I love you. Like don't leave me. And that they actually really do love. Right. And that's not a lie you can love. I, you can you be madly in love with with a woman. Okay. And that's the one that you said. Okay. This is the mother of my children. This is the one I'm going to marry. This is the one I'm going to live for the rest of my life. And and that's fine. Okay. However, however, if another pretty girl or sometimes is what they're into. So sometimes it could be something completely, I don't know, different right than what they have. But if another girl passes in front of them and they see that girl and they like the girl for not to marry, not to love, not not to say that's going to be also the mother of my children, and that's going to be the love of my life. But they're going to want to look at that girl, and there's going to be a thought that's going to go through their brain of like, man, I like to be with that girl. Yeah. That's just how it goes. And listen, women, it's hard for women to understand it. And there are men who I know that say, oh, that's not me. Well, yes, it is, because it happened. I have it, it's in our DNA. It's it's wired that way. And so men who say, I only have eyes for one women. They're lying. You may love one person. You may only want to be with that one person for the rest of your life. But if there was a chance, an opportunity for you to be with that other girl or other girls without jeopardizing what you have at home, you take advantage of it. If you told me you wouldn't, you are just 100% fake and liar. I mean, maybe they just know how to suppress it better. It's not that those thoughts don't come through their mind, okay? But maybe thoughts deep down inside they know how to suppress. No, no, no, listen, I never said no one knows that. No no no no no no no I never said that. They act on it. I always said if the girl passes by, they see they're going to think about it. Okay. So by the definition of cheating, just by thinking about it, you may not be acting on it, but you still have that urge to want to do it. Yeah, a lot of people, you're right. A lot of men don't take action on it because they know that, hey, it's wrong. I'm not supposed to do it. I don't want to jeopardize what I have. I don't want my wife to feel bad. I don't want to be, you know, uh, completely, you know, break my family, you know, and and and some men don't act on it. You're right. But they still think about it, and they still want to do it. They just don't do it. But some. Yeah. Okay. But again, if there was a shot where they can take advantage of doing all the stuff they want to do to other girls and still go back home with their wife, and they knew that they wouldn't get caught and they knew that it would in jeopardize what they have at home, they would act on it. They would do it. Right. Well, I have to I think that's very true. Yeah. I mean, it's it's it's what it is. So, um. From people that men that I have asked because I'm not going to put anyone on the spot. Um, is it true? I mean, I don't know if you would know the answer to this, but when I've asked this because they say sometimes they just get bored with what's at home. Yeah, it's not necessarily, uh, that they want to replace the person, but they just get bored of what they have at home. Yeah. And they just need something new. Yeah. Well, you know, there there's a lot of stuff that goes behind it. You know, this is why I feel when there is a man and a woman in a relationship. Okay, let's hit the marriage. Okay. Even. Even if they're not married. Okay? Even if they just lived together and never really made it legally married. Okay. This is why you gotta always not get too comfortable with a person, okay? And not get on that comfort zone where you, you know, let's just talk about the physical part of it, right? It happens. Both men and women, they let themselves go. Right. And a lot of the times the women don't like an obese man. And a lot of the times the men don't like an obese woman. Right. And so the physical has a lot to do with it. Okay. Then also the, the the sex. Right. Sometimes it just gets boring and sometimes they don't try something new or sometimes they don't keep things spiced. Right. And so it just becomes repetitive and it becomes boring. And, and there is times I've heard of even men saying like, oh man, maybe once a week or once every two weeks. And a man has the urge to, you know. Have sex more than that per week, right? But maybe that spouse just doesn't feel like it. Or, you know, the food has a lot to do with it, right? The fact that they're eating food that is heavily over processed and it makes your body tired, and maybe they have a tough job or vice versa. And it goes both ways. Right. Because but yeah, that does happen. And then so the men get tired, right? And all of a sudden they meet another girl and the girl's probably like a super freak, right. And she might like him. And of course he's like, shit, yeah, this is what I'm missing at home. My wife don't give it to me. Or vice versa. I could go the other way to where the woman goes. Man, I just met a younger guy, you know? And. And this guy, it's like, in his 20s. And my husband's already in his mid 40s or 50s or whatever. And the women looks good. And the guy's like, I want to be with the older women. And so she's finding somewhere else something that her husband is not giving. That's the neglect part. And vice versa man and women. But yeah. Yeah. I go back to your question. Yeah. There there's there's definitely 100% when it's a partnership, it's a business. A marriage is a business. If you don't take care of your business, if you're not constantly evolving, growing, taking care of it, make sure everything stays, stays fresh. It's just going to become old. And you know, it's gonna eventually close, right? Yeah, it's the same thing. So how would you say for, I guess, the women listening? How would you I don't want to say stop it, but I guess kind of stop this from even happening, if that's possible. For. For the marriage. Yeah. For. So they never get to that would know they never get to that point where they're bored of each other and they have to go seek something somewhere else. Well, you're seeing according to men, it doesn't even have to be that they're bored, that it's. How do you stop the urge of a man? Yeah. No you don't. Or no. Maybe not the urge, but, like, how do you stop, uh, a spouse from cheating? Uh, well, you there's a lot, like I said, going back to what I said, right? I keep on keeping things fresh, staying active sexually, the both of them. Right. Um, some people I've heard don't like sex, which surprises me. Right. Uh, but that does happen. And then everybody's different, right? Uh, but you got to keep things fresh, right? You gotta I, I say you gotta be active. You gotta. You gotta work out. You gotta look good for your partner. Um, you know, as far as stopping the urge, women stopping the urge for men is it's not going to happen. I would suggest also communication, I think huge. I think that's one thing that's helped us tremendously. If we talk about on our personal side, I don't have a problem. And I know you don't have a problem if I see a girl at the gym or anywhere and I tell you, man, that girl is pretty, or that girl has a nice body or whatever, right? I don't I don't have a problem on, on telling you that and, um, you know, and vice versa. Right. If you see a guy and we're watching a show and you're like, oh, he's very good looking, or I know that hardly ever happens. Well, I mean, that's you, don't you? I mean, because you're the only one I see. This is you're supposed to tell the truth on this show. It's on filter. You're not supposed to lie and keep things in a light. Uh, okay. All right. But, uh, but, yeah, so that I, I think communication has a lot to do with. I think communication is huge. And I know that was difficult for us because I, I want to say that when we did start opening up about a lot of things, um, you didn't want to tell me a lot of the stuff that you were thinking in your mind because you thought it was going to hurt me. Yeah. And, um. We obviously got past that right. Uh, I can't. I obviously can't speak for all women because I don't know if all women would act the way I acted. You know, like, to me, that's not an issue. But I understand that, um, for a lot of women, it is. It takes a tremendous amount of maturity and understanding. You know, I think when you're. When we were younger. Right? Um, we we could have never had the conversations that we have today, you know. Um, and that's just because of maybe in maturity, maybe because you don't really understand. And I kind of I think for me, um, confidence was a huge issue. Like, right when I was younger, I wasn't maybe as confident as I am now. Yeah. Uh, so obviously, you talking about another girl would hurt me because I never saw myself at her level, or I always thought she was prettier, or I always thought he's going to replace me with her or whatever. Um, but now that I'm older and it's not that I think I look better. And it's not that I think they look better. Better. Thank you. It's not that. It's just that. Now I understand that. Obviously, there are a lot of beautiful women. I'm not gonna think that. You think that I'm the only beautiful woman. Yeah, and it's just a confidence thing now where I'm okay with you talking about other girls, and I don't know if that makes any. Yeah, I know, 100%. It makes sense. Because you gotta understand, number one, it's your self-confidence, right? And, yeah, we have insecurities. All of us. Every single person has insecurities, right? And a lot of the times, unfortunately, the insecurities run higher than your confidence does. And so when your insecurity is higher than your confidence, you cannot stand. Yeah, you cannot stand your partner talking about another person. This is why there are so many jealous men, right? Like like they would not allow their girls to go anywhere on their own. I've heard, I've seen, I've even seen guys that don't even allow their wives to pump gas on their own? Yes. You know, when I started hearing them like. Yeah. Don't pump gas. Yeah. No, because there's men at the gas station and they're going to talk to them, you know. And so when, when your insecurities are higher than your confidence. And that's going to happen when you start maturing. Right. And obviously in our and we've read books we've been through I don't know how many countless self improving seminars. Right. And then you start your confidence just becomes higher. And that communication kicks in between the the husband and wife and and your insecurities just kind of, you know, get lower. The insecurities are always going to be there. Right? Yeah. Because you're thinking, man, there might be somebody younger, somebody more, I don't know, fitter or whatever, younger, beautiful or, you know, more pretty or whatever. Right. So the insecurities would always be there. But they're they're little insecurities compared to your confidence being up so high because. You know, you understand that person. You know. And so that's why communication helps. Because it understands build that trust and that confidence in a sense. Huge. Right. Um, do you remember when we started talking? I don't know if I remember the exact point where we were like, okay, like we have to have serious talks, like, as far as, like, um, even just our fantasies, right? Yeah. Because I think it's so important to fulfill each other's fantasies. Sexual fantasies, sexual fantasies, you know, because everyone, I think has a different point of view of of sex and how they like to be pleasured. And if you don't take that into account, I think that is so big because you're not helping your partner become satisfied. Right. If you don't understand what they like or if you don't understand, um, you know, their fantasies or fetishes even. Yeah. Um, I think it's you bypassed everything that is so important to them that that is a lot of times why they sneak away or like, cheat. Because maybe somebody else pleasures them the way you never even thought to pleasure them, because you've never even asked them that. Correct. So I don't know if I remember when we started talking about that, but I think it's made a huge. Difference in our sex life or even in our life in general, right? Uh, I think we're a lot more happier now that we understand each other and we understand each other's fantasies and even fetishes that we're able to, um, satisfy them, each in our own way. Yeah, yeah, 100%. I don't know if there's anything more that I can add to it, but yeah, I agree. And and that comes back to once again, communication. You know, and you said something earlier today that, um, years ago. Right. I was and I and I admit it, I think we even talked about it on some of our other podcasts where, you know, a lot of the times the men. Right. And I'm sure it happens for women as well. They don't really want to open up and tell their partners, like what they're into or what they like or how they feel or, uh, because we're afraid that we're going to hurt you. Right? Um, and that was my case. You know, anything that hurts you hurts me even more. So the fact that if I think I'm going to do something and it's going to hurt you, or if I've done something in the past that it that it hurt you, it it just broke my heart, you know. And so that's why I said, okay, well, I have two options, right? I can either you can't suppress it. Right. And a lot of people suppress. And this is why they become, um, uh, old grumpy men, old grumpy men. But this is how this is how marriages end up in hating each other, but still being together. Okay? You know, because they can't stand their wives, they can't stand their husbands, right? But they stick together, right? And that's be a lot of it has to do with this, because they were not able to open up and tell their spouses, look, this is what I like. This is what I'm into. And it's not going to happen overnight. It didn't happen overnight for you and I. Right know the stuff that we do. It was just progressing little by little. Right? And then opening up and then trying new things. And then next thing you know, you're like, hey, that wasn't that bad, right? Or vice versa. And then you evolve from there, right? It's just something that it must be done in a marriage in order for the marriage to last. Yeah. And to last living. And in a harmonious way, if that makes sense. Yeah. Where everything is in sync, where the dynamic works and not. I'm. I'm not talking about surviving in a marriage where they both hate each other. Yeah, yeah, they've been together 40 years or 30 years or 20 years, but they can't stand each other. You know, and they just. You see what I'm saying? There's there's differences. Yeah. Um, I think it was a lot of times I felt like you were slipping away from me, and I didn't want that. And then that's also a reason why I needed to know more of how I could take care of you, in a sense. And when a spouse opens up to you and actually says, like, this is what I want. This is what I need. Don't be so quick to be like, that's not happening. Yeah. You know, you I think you have to give yourself a chance because it's so easy to just. Especially if that's not. In the realm where you are like, you don't ever see yourself being a certain way or doing a certain thing because there's so many different types of fetishes and fantasies. Obviously you can't even we can't even talk about them. There's just ridiculous amounts of them. So but don't cut your spouse off so quickly and be like, that's just not happening, right? Right. I, I think you need to give everything a chance, at least the one time and be like, okay, that was it. Yeah. So I like that. I didn't like that. Yeah. Because you don't know until you try it. Right. Right. You know. Yeah. And I, I don't want to go into specifics because there I mean, there's so many specifics. Yeah. I mean, and again, even, even if you were to go into some of our specifics and it's not going to resonate with some people listening because there might be incomplete, something different, something else. Right. You know, and we're we're at a point where we hear what some people are into and we're like, okay, we listen. We don't judge. Yeah, right. We we we listen. That's good. Just a few days ago, we heard about something and then, okay, that somebody is into something. Right. And then we're like, whoa, okay. I didn't expect that. But hey, whatever. Whatever floats your boat. Yeah, absolutely. So we anyway, so you guys, we listen, we don't judge, right? But, um, going back to what you said, I love listening and I definitely don't judge because I love hearing about. I mean, if anyone ever opens up, I obviously love hearing about it, but we definitely don't judge. I'm like, yeah, that's amazing for them that they could do that. Yeah. You know what? Okay, so here's one thing. When it comes out, you said you're love listening. But I got another point I want to bring up to, um, because most people are taboo about this. They don't want to talk about, like, their sexual lives or their sexual preferences or their sexual. Yeah. Their intimacy. Right. They feel like it's so taboo, you know, and and just think about this for a second, which you should I don't understand and yes, do people do just. Yeah. People do judge and I'm, I'm not talking you're gonna post it on social media for everybody. It's it's not that's not what I'm talking about. Yeah. No, but I'm talking about like a face, a face, a conversation. Just like if we're talking to another couple, you know, it's very rare when another person says something about their sexual life. We're more open about that than they are. And sometimes they kind of, like, get shocked and change the conversation. Right? We're like, all right, whatever. Right? I guess you're not open to it. Um, but what I was, what I was gonna say earlier today, uh, just right now is, you know, it wasn't until you said that. Let me hear you out. Let me understand you. But think about how much better our marriage has gotten since we communicated that. Yes, you see what I'm saying? So that is the opposite of having a hateful marriage and an A in a marriage where they can't stand each other. Yeah, right. The opposite of that. It's it's living in sync and having that dynamic work because there's that communication and because there are those new things that we've done and we've tried. And so I don't feel like I have the need to say, well, I'm going to go behind Susie's back and I'm going to talk to this girl over here that I met at the gym without you knowing, because there's no need for me to hide it. We almost became like, I told you this. We almost became like a best friend, right? Like, if you have a guy best, like for men that are listening and they have a guy best friend, and let's say the guy goes to the gym and meets a girl, right? And the girls like, whatever, flirting back or they're talking or whatever, right? That guy's is going to go tell his friend. He's going to say, dude, I met this girl at the gym. She's fine. Oh my God, you should see this girl, right? Da da da da da da blah blah blah. That's how it goes. I could tell you that. Yes. Where most men can not tell that to their wives. Because you see what I'm saying? You get so obsessed. So the fact that I have that relationship with you where I can come to you. What did I tell you the other day? I talked to my gym crush today. Right? Yeah, I was talking to her today. Yeah. And so you would be like. Your answer was. Which one? Yeah. That's true. I told you, the one. There's the one, right? But anyways, um, that's what I mean. It's almost like when you comes down to your partner, you have to get to that point where you tell them the things that you would tell your best friend. Yeah. And and I've also heard some people say, oh, you're not supposed to tell your spouse everything. Well, that's fine too. If that was works for them and they'd rather keep things to themselves and, you know, keep things away from another, then, you know. Again that I don't judge. As far as for women, I think all women should at least give their husband the chance to at least say it. Does that make sense? Mhm. If I you I, you could tell me if I'm wrong, but doesn't it feel so much better to be able to say it to me rather than hiding it. I mean, yeah, and a lot of the times I think the betrayal for me would be if you hide it from me rather than you telling me. Right. I would dislike it so much if you hid something from me, rather than you just telling me straight up. And I know that's very, very difficult for a lot of women. There's a lot of women that cannot stand or hear their husband saying that somebody else is beautiful. He's mine. Yeah. That toxic vibe. Yep. Um, but I always say, like, dude, just give it a chance. Just let them say it. It's not that they're gonna, like, act on it or, you know, and at one point, maybe they will act on it because you don't let them say it. Correct. So here, your spouse out, your partner out. Sometimes they just want to say it to you to relieve themselves of this, like betrayal that maybe they're feeling right rather than them holding it in and hiding it from you because you're going to get upset. I agree, and you know, the thing about it is for men that are listening is okay, just because we have this communication and I have the trust and you have the trust with me, it doesn't mean we're going to abuse it either. No. Does that make sense? That's not what I'm trying to get to because I think it helps it from not being abused. Correct. It takes it takes away from the wanting to do it because you're not being led to. Yeah. Does that make sense? I and I told you this the other day, having the opportunity to do it and not do it, it's better than not having the opportunity to do it and doing it. Yeah. Make sense? Yeah. And so the fact that you, you, you know, you could but you don't abuse it. Right. Because again you have that communication man. My wife don't know I don't want you know and not doing it. That's different. But if like it happens all the time this is why there's so many cheaters. It's because they know they're not supposed to do it. They don't have that ability to do it because their spouse is like, no, no, no, no, no in society and all these world. Right. That tells you that only one one. Right. And then they go and they act on it. Because they weren't supposed to. Then all of a sudden that's that's the problem. Yeah, that's the cheating part. Yeah. And that's where most men are. I'm sorry, guys, you cannot tell me you don't, you know, I mean, and I'm a man. And I'll tell you if I if I don't feel at this point, if I had the opportunity to be with another girl that I like and I'd rather, you know. Yeah, I'd rather, you know, I'd rather, you know first before it happens than me going, acting on it and then you finding out later on through somebody else. Yeah. And I'm at that point where you would know. Yes. Does that make sense? Yeah. Where where where where? Most men just. They're not there. They don't have that opportunity. They don't have that. I mean, and I'm talking men in a relationship. Yeah. Because there's a lot of single men that that doesn't apply to. Oh, absolutely. This doesn't apply to single people. I think we were watching a show I don't remember or something that we were. And the guy was talking to several women, and then one of the girls was like, well, he cheated on me. I'm like, oh yeah. I'm like, he wasn't with you. He were. You guys were weren't her relationship, right? Yeah. You were one of the girls he was talking to? Yes. But you guys were not in a relationship. And just because he went and talked to someone else doesn't make him a cheater. Yeah. You guys, you guys are not together because he's single girls. He's single or she's single, you know, talked to, said about it and I'm like. You shouldn't be upset, though. You. You guys are not an item. But that's also the newer generation. I know they don't. They're talking. They're seeing each other. They're dating. They have all these titles other than, you know, we're a couple. We're exclusive. We're not exclusive. We're open or close. You know, like, um, that's that's just a newer thing. But I mean, I think that's it. I don't know if we have anything else to cover, but I think as far as our point of view, that's our point of view. Yeah. And like I said, this is this is how I want to look at it. But for me, I don't want to be left in the dark. Yeah. And I don't want all these people to know that something is going on behind my back and not tell me. Yeah. You know, like. And then I look like a dodo head for not knowing. Right then actually just knowing which that is what hurts most people. Yes. I mean, obviously it's not just you. It's it's most men and women, you know, and unfortunately happens more to women than it does happen to men because of how we are. But that's really how it is. Yeah. It's usually when there is a quote unquote cheating going on, it's because it's behind somebody's back. You know, that's just how it is. But the one thing that I would, um, you and I have talked about is when we do hear about other couples. Right. And things that. Are going in between them or have gone in between them, right. How I, I know that you and I have talked about how much better their marriage would have been. Mhm. If they would have had that openness and that communication like you and I have. Yeah. I think there would be so many more relationships saved um, that are not saved or that are living in hateful times. Right. Because they can't stand each other if, if they were really to work on that. Yeah. You know, I, I, I feel that's my personal opinion that every marriage, every husband and wife or partnership, whoever same sex, it doesn't matter if they had that openness in that communication, then they understood each other and their needs and everything sexually fantasies, fetishes, you know, wants, needs. You know, if they understood that and they knew how to, um, I don't want to say comply, but if they knew how to work with it. Yeah. That man, your life will be so much better. Yeah. You would have an awesome relationship. Like I feel we have. Yeah. Not perfect because we're still working on it, right? Oh, absolutely. It's getting better. But at the same time, I'm. I can easily say right here that it is a hundred times better than what it was eight years ago or whatever. Mhm. And it keeps getting better. I mean and if you hear it better. Oh thank you. The compliments man gets me every time. So if you're a couple or even a single person and you want to talk more to us about this, we're always happy to listen. We don't judge. We're marriage counselors. We're not a marriage counselor. No we're not. No, not at all. But no no, no, no, it has done. No. We could just talk about our own experiences. Yeah. How we've been able to, like. We're open to it. Obviously, we won't air it. No, no, not at all. Private conversations. We can talk about it. Absolutely. Couples single don't matter. Yeah. Ask us questions. Ask us questions. We're more than happy to answer them. Yep. Interesting topic. Very, um. Controversial, maybe. Yeah. Taboo, maybe. Like my best friend says, if your man cheats, you cheat too. Yay! See, he's a firm believer of, like. Oh, no, you know what? Here's the thing. I get why women don't like men anymore. I get it, I. I get it 100%. I don't disagree when I hear shit that happens between a guy did this, I just laugh and I'm like, yep. Mhm. Oh that guy did. Yeah. Well you know I mean like wow. Or when we hear somebody and somebody DM and sliding in there. Oh my gosh I have so many of those stories. We hear that and you're like whoa, whoa. He's buried in my friend's DMs. Yeah. And they're posting like they love it. Oh, oh, the stories I have about that man. Social media. You know, if I could air out all the DMs my friends get anyway. So, yeah, that'd be interesting. But we won't. Never. I would never, ever. So never, ever say that. Awesome. Great topic. Well, thank you again. Let us know. Let us know how we can help you out if we can. All right guys. Well thank you. Have a great week. Have a great week. We'll talk to you soon. See ya. Let's go eat I love you. Let's go. Bye bye. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Unfiltered Us. If you enjoyed this conversation, don't forget to hit that follow button so you never miss an episode. Would love to hear your thoughts, drop a comment and join in the conversation. If you think someone else will enjoy today's chat, go ahead and share this episode with them. Your support means the world to us. Until next time, stay real and stay unfiltered.